Poker is like Sex?

So I’m playing online Texas No Limit Hold-‘Em’ poker at a nine-player table. I was especially inspired tonight because of the wonderful Banana-Flavored edibles thanks to my friend Buddy.

In other words, for those who know me, when I’m “Inspired”, I write a LOT, stoned or not.

Now, at this site, the only one I’ll play at, (clubwpt.com), the communication via texting between players, if any, is NH (means Nice Hand, I always say NICE FOOT), LOL! That one seems to be popular. I type out, HAHAHAHA!

https://www.clubwpt.com/

Now, the less advanced of the “Short Talkers” as I call them, usually type out the words “Nice Hand” or whatever.

Then there’s this dude tonight that I have been directing most of my chat room essays to, including one that was directed towards three players including the dude, about sex versus poker and other interesting stories.

And then the dude mysteriously went from plain English to indecipherable gibberish, like G@&c blfg5, that for all I know, is possibly a stab at rudeness-like “Table Talk” that he automatically thinks the whole world will understand what the fuck he’s saying, meant to disturb your psyche, but me? It just makes this idiot of a player seem even funnier to me.

But guess what folks? I’m the King of Table Talk in real life face to face poker tournaments (I’ve won two old-farts Sunday tournaments in Laughlin), and I challenge ANYONE to put up the $10,000 for me to table talk with all those people at the next WSOP Tournament (I’ll win it all, we split 60/40, the 60% for you). This online poker chat room? Piece of Pie!

Some players like myself will actually carry on a conversation with other players because they are friends, i.e., like the friends I have made in the game over the course of three years playing on the same website, which IS FREE, I say again. I digressed.

I’m usually half-way between George Carlin and myself when I’m stoned, so tonight, here was my “suggestion” to a few really bad poker players. “You know, there are two totally unrelated things that are very similar in a way. Poker and Sex”.

With Poker, the more patient you are, (called being tight), the more satisfying and rewarding the game is, if your “Skill-Set is above average.

In other words, dudes & dudettes, don’t blow your whole Wad (chips) in five hands. Same as sex.

If you’re a dude, especially, don’t blow your wad and roll over and go to sleep. Your “Lady” will certainly enjoy you much more if you are……Wait for it…..PATIENT! PLAY YOUR CARDS RIGHT, YOU MIGHT STAY MARRIED UNTIL DEATH DO YOU PART (OLD AGE)!

Postscript: We’ll, it DOES take “Two” to Tango”. My ex? She was the one that quickly rolled over and went to sleep. I would’ve loved to have typed, “rolled off of me two hours later”, but she was a one position only kind of a gal, if you know what I mean.

Postscript Two: Dudes, if your Lady knows how to dance, dance with her! Kind of a poetic ending to my essay?

Postscript Three: If you are already on the “Club, or you are just joining, my “Handle” is DOCTCS.

Postscript Four: I’m thinkin’ that Men with Men and Women with Women MAY just be a lot more fun and satisfying, although I’m straight as an arrow myself, and there has been two different women in my life that have truly exhausted me after three hours.

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Peace & Abide, La paz y la morada, السلام والالتزام , שלום ושמירה, Paix et Demeure, Խաղաղությունը եւ մնալը, Мир и пребывание,, 平和と遵守, 和平與恪守, Aştî û Abad, صلح و عبید, Fred och Abide, Kapayapaan at Patuloy, Frieden und Bleiben, Mir i Ostanite, शांति और निवास, Hòa bình và ở lại, Мир и Абиде, שלום און בלייַבן, สันติภาพและการปฏิบัติ, Mir in bivanje,