Here are a few movies (and sometimes my review) that I have watched beginning with the most recent, and felt like sharing with my friends/visitors to my website via Facebook.
Make some popcorn, load you bong, invite some friends over for a movie night. Just click on the “link” below each image to go directly to the YouTube video.
June 5th, 2023
I have seen a lot of Jason Statham movies probably about seven of them and tonight I watched his best in my opinion.
Released in 2012, the movie SAFE was written and directed by Boaz Yakin and kept my attention every second.
The script/screenplay is great in my opinion, the structure of the story of an Einstein ten-year-old Chinese girl that has the ability to memorize numbers, long strings of numbers, and why this would interest the Chinese Mob, the Russian Mob, the dirty cops, and in the surprise twist near the end, the Mayor of New York City.
It took me a while to figure out the reason behind the coveted numbers because I was stoned when I watched it.
As usual, it took me about three hours to watch a movie that was one hour, thirty-four minutes and thirty-eight seconds long. (1:34:38) as I was inspired to write this review as I would pause the movie along the way to write. It took me an additional five hours to finish this review, and I appreciate everyone who reads this will be encouraged to watch the movie.
From the beginning, the story takes so many twists and turns, it made it interesting to see how the story was conceived and written. As a writer myself, I could see how clever and creative the writing was to intentionally enlighten the viewers slowly throughout the movie with every twist and turn making sense to me. Oscar material that never got a mention.
SAFE was produced by Lawrence Bender and Dani Brunetti. Executive Producers Stuart Ford and Brian Kavanaugh-Jones, Kevin Spacey, and Deepak Nayar. A great Film Editor Frederic Thoraval. For a ten-year-old in a co-lead role, Catherine Chan should have an Oscar sitting on the shelf with her Barbie Doll collection.
My favorite dialogue/conversation begins at 1:18:57 right after the gay rich dude killed five Chinese dudes with guns to get the Einstein Girl Mei for Luke (Jason Statham) in exchange for the $30 million dollars plus the disk containing Top Secret classified data that would be useful to the Communist Chinese government.
Gay dude says, “Come on, Luke” into his cellphone. Luke says, “The old place. Just you and me”. Mei says, “You’re a friend of Luke?”
The gay dude responds with a genius line that really sums up the whole movie for me. He says to Mei, “Not as far as you’re concerned “.
Up until he said that, for just a second I had hoped that he would respond saying something positive that would indicate to Mei that she was safe with the rich gay dude.
Then wham! I’m sure Mei felt disappointed, maybe scared just a little because she had just been a witness to unbelievable carnage that the prissy looking gay dude had just released upon the Chinese gangsters earlier.
One of my favorite scenes from a writer’s POV begins at 1:20:58 and ends at 1:24:25. At first I thought that we were going to see some real ass-kicking, BUT, and it’s a BIG BUTT…..I was paying attention and caught that look as Mei glanced at the gay dudes gun sticking in the sand handle-up. I knew that she was going to grab the gun conveniently sticking in the sand handle-up. I just thought we would still see at least a good five or six minutes of a surreal MMA fight without the cage. Hahahaha!
I didn’t mention other talents like Production Management, Cinematography etcetera, but they all did a great job.
Full circle back to the beginning of my review. I stated, “I have seen a lot of Jason Statham movies, probably about seven of them and tonight I watched his best in my opinion”.
By far, I think Jason is the best in his genre, and better than anyone else like a Bruce Willis, Schwarzenegger, or a Stallone…..or anyone else in a similar genre, Action Hero type primarily.
He would have made a great James Bond if it wasn’t for the fact that he just looks to buff? Compared to all the other actors that have played 007 that is.
Well, that’s my review folks. If you did read my review and you do want to see this movie, I’ve included the YouTube link for you. Enjoy!
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Okay friends, here’s another one of my famous movie reviews of a film you possibly never heard of (straight to VHS? I’ll have to check on that).
Here’s the link: https://youtu.be/AvOlDxTyJb8
Cartel War – 2010
L.A. undercover cops disregard the law to bring down the most powerful drug mob in the U.S. Loosely based on Mexico’s once most powerful drug cartel leader, this journey into the drug underworld cuts to the bone and through the heart. (the previous paragraph story-line by Popcornflix on YouTube).
Producer: Jack Lucarelli
Director: Jack Lucarelli and Troy Price
Writer: Jack Lucarelli
Stars: Jack Lucarelli, Mercedes Brito, Roberto ‘Sanz’ Sanchez, Sandra Luesse
Run-time: 1 hour 31 minutes
The time it took me to watch it and write this review: 4 hours and 12 minutes and 23 seconds.
If I will ever be famous for, alive or dead, it’s as the “World’s Greatest Movie Critic”, because I took the idea of “Reviewing a movie” to a much higher level, in fact, taking what would be a typical movie critic’s review of his initial impression of the movie, even if using short-hand to make notes while he’s watching the movie, well, he certainly isn’t speaking into some sort of hand-held audio-recording devices, or his iphone, especially if the critic, he or she, is sitting IN a theater with 200 hundred other people that would get a little pissed if he/she was actually “talking” into his cellphone or “other” recording device, right?
So, what you get from the typical “Professional Movie Critic” is at best, short-hand, at least a really good memory, of seconds of a film, a scene, the overall LOOK of the movie.
What I have done is expanded the “Idea” of a movie review and “Reviewed the Movie” sometimes 29 minutes and 47 seconds at a time, simply because I had to stop and write all the preceding down, realizing that, “Oh, SHIT!, I’m doing this “Movie Review” for the third time now, I’m “Stoned” and I absolutely LOVE doing this review.
As I begin with a few words about Jack Lucarelli, the Lead Actor in the movie “Cartel Wars”. His interpretation of, and performance especially, as Detective Mike Marino.
Jack Lucarelli stars as Detective Mike Marino, the main character, except it did take me what seems like an unusually long time to figure out that “He” WAS the main character, like 28 minutes and 47 seconds into the movie for that “Light Bulb” to go on, so to speak, when I should have known it from the very start of the movie. Hahahahahaha.
That’s what happens when I smoke bong-load as I just begin watching this movie tonight, (or maybe it was the last movie, i.e., the one before this one that I am exactly 28 minutes and 47 seconds into this movie and I had to stop to write down this “thought” about the acting by Jack Lucarelli as opposed to if it had been a specific “Superstar” like Michael Douglas, who sort of looks like Jack, and very well could have played that role, instead of Jack.
So, having said that, my instincts tell me right now that this “Role” was meant for, written for, Jack Lucarelli, who DID “Write, Produce, Direct, Act/Star” in this movie, and for that, and THAT alone, Jack did a great job in that role as Detective Mike Marino. Having said that, I can now continue to watch the rest of the fucking movie for God’s sake!!
I can sum up my review of Jack Lucarelli’s performance in one sentence. Jack did as good a job portraying that character as he did, as one would expect from a Superstar Actor like Michael Douglas, so BRAVO Jack! Great acting, which did quite a bit to help “Lift” the movie “Up” for me in the first place.
One last thought before I start the movie again: The “Character” of Detective Mike Marino as written in the script and portrayed by Jack, goes from a role in the beginning, like a few other characters in the beginning that COULD have developed into the MAIN character, to, ok, now we the audience, is not sure if “Jack” is a “Good Cop” or “Bad Cop” to, ok, now we know that in spite of the fact that “Jack” worked in a “Special” Police Outfit, that got away with a lot of bad shit, he does his job and brings down the major drug lord and his entire family, and we find out the politics of it, the drug lord’s sister is dating the Mayor of Los Angeles, or is a good friend at least, which makes you wonder a little why the Los Angeles Police Commission folks are trying to shut Jack’s operation down. Perhaps it’s also because the drug lord is supplying Cocaine to most of the upper-crust of Los Angeles and Hollywood society.
By the time I actually start watching this movie again, I have spent one hour and 3 minutes and 54 seconds watching/writing the first 39 minutes and 47 seconds of this movie because I had to pop some popcorn, melt a quarter-stick of real butter to sprinkle on my popcorn, take a piss, grab another can of Dos XX, discover I still had a bar of Hershey’s Dark Chocolate, take a few more hits, and then go hide my “Bong” somewhere where I won’t find it for a few days, it’s inspiring me, but, back to the movie.
Then at 42 minutes and 25 seconds into the movie and you get the feeling not that he’s being followed, which you find out in a few more minutes, but you say to yourself, “This is NOT Miami Vice”, but he does drive two high-end cars, even for a city like Los Angeles, a Porsche and an Audi, (Oh, but wait! He’s in a “Special” Drug Unit of the LAPD, or NYPD because later in the movie, at 58 minutes and 58 seconds, the Special Unit’s “Commander” uses the word, “Manhattan” in this sentence, “See what the hell he’s doing in Manhattan”).
However, in another unrelated sentence, someone used the word” Catalina” referring to the watery grave of some other dude. So, which is it? Los Angeles or New York City? Ahhhhh, at 1 hour 1 minute 1 second in the ole’ “Light Bulb” goes on when I see the LAPD badge as opposed to the NYPD badge and realize that it IS Los Angeles and LAPD instead of New York City and NYPD, in spite of the fact that I HAD seen the badge earlier in the movie, it’s just that the use of the word, “Manhattan” through me off for a bit there. Ohhh, and jumping over the desk at the drug lord was GREAT, Jack!
When I really love ALL aspects of a film, the screenplay, the directing, the cinematography, the acting of the major roles, i.e., the portrayal of the main characters, etcetera, I will go into deep detailed “Reviews” of each aspect. When I have a few issues that bother me, I generally don’t rip a film apart like the typical Professional Movie Critic do for any aspect that they considered worthy to tear apart, I simply let the audience that reads my review to watch the movie for themselves to discover their OWN parts of the movie, the production, screenplay, whatever, that bothered them as well.
I will say that I enjoyed watching this movie. I was entertained. Wither there is any aspect of the movie that deserves to be considered for Oscar Nomination or not, that’s for the Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences to figure out and vote on, and I’m not a member, so I’m not qualified to have a say or vote on the matter.
I WILL say that Jack Lucarelli did a great job of making his “Character” believable, and that was a positive aspect of the film, and Jack did as good a job as a Superstar like Michael Douglas would have done, except Douglas would have made the film more money and more recognition.
I also have to mention that the “Cat and Mouse” game between the drug lord’s sister Catalina Vega played by Mercedes Brito, and the undercover female cop Gina Cassidy played by Sandra Luesse was a fascinating part of the film (and well written). You never know for sure at 55 minutes in wither the sister is going to kill the female undercover cop because she does realize that her brother’s girlfriend IS a cop…..or fuck her, hahahahaha. Note: The role of the drug lord’s sister could have been a good role for Selma Hayek.
It’s interesting that earlier the Undercover Female Cop is “Pulled Out”, but they never show either her telling the drug lord that he mother is dying in some hospital in Chicago, or somewhere, (as her excuse to leave the drug lord), or, we see a scene where the drug lord is asking his sister, “OK, what the fuck did you do with my Lady”?, i.e., or some discussion of where the hell did she go?
I have to say, I actually laughed when I saw the stenciling on Detective Marino’s bullet-proof vest, “DIVISION 123” when he was in the drug lord’s office towards the end of the movie. Why not “Division 374” or “Division 926”? Or, why not no name at all? Hahahahahahaha. At 1 hour 21 minutes 39 seconds when the drug lord says, “She won’t shoot”, I thought that was okay, but he must have done some really awful shit to the Undercover Female Cop to cause her to lose it and shoot the bad guy drug lord Antonio Vega played by Roberto Sanchez so many times, she was either really pissed, or physcho, shit, she dumped a full clip into him, my guess is physcho.
The last few minutes of the film were written like an ending would be written if you were wanting to sell this concept to NBC, ABC, CBS, or FOX as a Crime Drama Ensemble-Cast Feature Television Show, like a cross between Miami Vice, NYPD Blue, and NYPD Special Victims Unit. I thought it was a good try if that’s what Jack’s purpose for the film was. Again, major stars lacking? Should it have been picked-up by a major network as a series? I don’t know, I enjoyed the film, what more can I say, other than I certainly would have given it a shot for further development if I were a network bigwig.
You the reader of this review who haven’t seen the movie yet, I gave it 4 stars out of 5. Once you watch the movie, you can come up with your OWN review/critique. This YouTube channel “Popcornflix” did a great job of presenting this, good quality picture and sound. Enjoy.
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10.5 Apocalypse Now
This is a 2006 television miniseries so there are commercial and episode breaks that go Black Screen, but for only a few seconds. Written and directed by John Lafia, it’s a sequel to 2004’s 10.5, the show follows a series of catastrophic seismic disasters including earthquakes, Volcanic eruptions, tsunamis, and sinkholes, all triggered by an apocalyptic earthquake. The series was produced in Canada. Although it received primarily negative reviews, I really enjoyed everything about it. The story/screenplay, acting, and the “Special Effects”. Most of all, I thought the dialogue was brilliantly written, Make some popcorn invite some friends over, smoke a bowl or two. Enjoy.
Tom’s Rating: 5 Stars out of 5, a Good MOVIE!
Part One: https://youtu.be/BKAX9Ah7PXA?t=1360
Fart Two: https://youtu.be/oBQHCT2EUQ0?t=10
Parker
Starring Jason Statham, Jennifer Lopez, Nick Nolte
Daring, ruthless and meticulous, Parker (Jason Statham) is one of the most successful thieves in the business. But when his latest robbery turns deadly because of a careless crew member, he declines to join crime boss Melander (Michael Chiklis) and his gang for another heist. The crooks turn on Parker and leave him for dead. Parker survives and vows vengeance, tracing the gang to Palm Beach. There, he joins forces with an unlikely ally (Jennifer Lopez) to hijack the gang’s next big score. The fight in his hotel room near the end is one of the greatest fight scenes ever! The very last scene is soooo awesome! When his mentor is taken captive by a disgraced Arab Sheik, a killer-for-hire is forced into action. His mission: kill three members of Britain’s elite Special Air Service responsible for the death of his sons.
Tom’s Rating: 5 Stars out of 5, a Good MOVIE!
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/3Lj2s9i2DpE?t=121
Killer Elite
Staring Jason Statham, Robert DeNiro, Clive Owen
When his mentor is taken captive by a disgraced Arab Sheik, a killer-for-hire is forced into action. His mission: kill three members of Britain’s elite Special Air Service responsible for the death of his sons.
Tom’s Rating: 5 Stars out of 5 GREAT MOVIE!
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/d5TrI8u4UYs?t=48
Wild Card
Jason Statham, Michael Angarano, Dominik Garcia, Hope Davis, and a huge cast of other familiar actors
A bodyguard (Jason Statham) goes after the sadistic thug who beat his friend, only to find that the object of his wrath is the son of a powerful mob boss
Tom’s Rating: 4 1/2 Stars out of 5 The only reason I didn’t give it 5 Stars is because the picture quality could have been better.! The last fight in the parking lot of the diner at the end is another one of the greatest fight scenes ever!
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/JajxHWTLec0?t=128
The November Man
Pierce Brosnan and Olga Kurylenko
Five years into his retirement, CIA veteran Peter Devereaux (Pierce Brosnan) is pulled back into service to help retrieve a Russian agent — also his former lover — who has incriminating evidence on Federov, a corrupt Russian leader. When a different CIA team, led by Devereaux’s former protege (Luke Bracey), shows up, the mission goes south and Devereaux’s ex-lover is killed. Now a rogue agent, Devereaux drags a relief worker (Olga Kurylenko) along on his mission to settle the score.
Tom’s Rating: 5 Stars out of 5 GREAT MOVIE (seen it before)
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/Tekt9lNDcuQ?t=242
Two Guns
Starring Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg
Based on Graphic Novels by Steven Grant. For the past year, DEA agent Bobby Trench (Denzel Washington) and U.S. Navy intelligence officer Marcus Stigman (Mark Wahlberg) have been working under cover as members of a narcotics syndicate. The twist: Neither man knows that the other is an undercover agent. When their attempt to infiltrate a Mexican drug cartel and recover millions goes haywire, the men are disavowed by their superiors. Trench and Stigman must go on the run lest they wind up in jail or in a grave.
Tom’s Rating: 4 ½ Stars out of 5
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/fSHY1CO8hLE?t=332
Saints & Soldiers
Forward: I sometimes begin my reviews with the bla bla bla from Wikipedia to inform you, and as in this case, as a baseline for my own review.
From Wikipedia: Saints and Soldiers is a 2003 war drama film directed by Ryan Little and produced by Little and Adam Abel. It is loosely based on events that took place after the Malmedy massacre during the Battle of the Bulge. The film stars Corbin Allred, Alexander Niver, Lawrence Bagby, and Peter Asle Holden as the four American soldiers trying to return Kirby Heyborne, a British soldier with vital intelligence, to the Allied lines.
After conducting research on World War II and Battle of the Bulge, Little began shooting in January 2003 in Utah. Filming lasted 30 days. Little and Abel were able to save money on production by recruiting a group of World War II re-enactors who volunteered their services, costumes, and props. Excel Entertainment released the film at festivals to garner publicity before it was released to the public. The movie won numerous Best Picture awards from over 15 film festivals.
Critical reception was generally positive with praise towards the message, story, performances (particularly of Allred and Niver), production values and action sequences. Though the screenplay, pacing and ties to Mormonism were criticized by some reviewers, several film scholars argued that despite the LDS-related themes, the film appeals to a wide audience.
My Review: What can I say other than one single word, BRAVO! For a low-budgeted film and little-known folks associated with the making of this movie, when compared to a major Hollywood release with major studio involvement, with major stars, like Saving Private Ryan, this film Saints & Soldiers was JUST as good, if not better in comparison.
I could give a flying F&%@ about what Wikipedia and some critics said about “LDS Themes”, as this movie in my opinion, had it all, and when I say ALL, I’m saying that in addition to audiences at fourteen film festivals, i.e., the general public, awarding this film “Best Picture” honors, it SHOULD have won some Oscars. See my Postscript.
Bravo to the writers of the screenplay, Geoffrey Panos (story also), and Matt Whitaker. One of the major elements that I look for in a film is the dialogue, and it was “Spot On” as far as I’m concerned. The acting, i.e., the performances which includes the dialogue that the screenwriters’ type, was unbelievably good, by ALL of the actors in this film.
If I was told to pick just one performance for Best Actor Oscar, it’s a bit tough, a bit of a toss-up because all the main character “actors” did such a great job of bringing their “characters” to life on the screen, well in this case, my laptop screen. Okay, my pick is Corbin Allred, slightly edging out Alexander Polinsky (screen credit as listed by Wikipedia is Alexander Niver, why, I don’t know). It was a close call between all the actors, really. Mr. Polinsky, sir, at least Best Supporting Actor Oscar for you in my opinion.
Next, the directing by Ryan Little was at least Oscar Nomination worthy, if not an outright winner for him. Next, the music as well, was superb. Next, the cinematography, Costuming, Set Design/Decoration. I could go on and on about this film. I thoroughly was entertained, on the edge of my seat at times. Watch it, you will not be disappointed.
P. S. If there was a hint or mention of LDS during the film, I certainly missed it. Had the film been made by Southern Baptists or Episcopalians, the critics never would have mentioned the so-called LDS Themes. The fact that “Hollywood” is run and controlled by Zebraists is the ONLY reason this film did not receive any Oscars from the Zebraist-Controlled-AMPAS. It is a F&%$#@! shame, isn’t it.
Tom’s Rating: 5 Stars out of 5, should have won some Oscars!
Click here for the movie: https://youtu.be/ygw_dh1jsvw?t=438
Thanks for visiting my movie page. I’m sure there was at least one movie that you enjoyed. I will be adding more movies to this page from time to time, so, come back to Tom’s Movie Theatre often. If you feel like sharing this page with friends, that would be groovy. If you feel like donating the price of a cup of coffee, that would be awesome. Thanks.
For my faithful readers that are aware that I’m finally working on “The Dead Armadillo” story, like say, a Producer, or a Director, or a Screenwriter or someone or a company that desires to option my novel, you can contact me at any time, night or day. If you are a one of those faithful readers that wish to read and follow my progress as I work on this novel, I will be posting updates as a PDF file on every new post on this website/blog. Here’s the latest of “The Dead Armadillo”
TheDeadArmadilloManuscript111919
For those of you that would care to get involved with me on this project, as I intend to hire a professional screenwriter at some point, and produce a feature film, I have recently been approved for a KICKSTARTER campaign where you can contribute. Here is the link to the KICKSTARTER campaign.
Peace & Abide, La paz y la morada, السلام والالتزام , שלום ושמירה, Paix et Demeure, Խաղաղությունը եւ մնալը, Мир и пребывание,, 平和と遵守, 和平與恪守, Aştî û Abad, صلح و عبید, Fred och Abide, Kapayapaan at Patuloy, Frieden und Bleiben, Mir i Ostanite, शांति और निवास, Hòa bình và ở lại, Мир и Абиде, שלום און בלייַבן, สันติภาพและการปฏิบัติ, Mir in bivanje,
P. S. As an Optimist and a Futurist, I believe we will find the peace I so often write about, eventually, if we can accomplish a miracle or two, or three before we get to that fork in the road. If you agree to all the wars, and you are a shareholder in several companies that manufacture weapons of war, it is beyond stupid, it’s insane, give yourself a Lobotomy. If you are a Zebraist, or support Zebraism, your just due is coming very soon.
We sometimes think it is hopeless and against all odds, but hey, we are part of the 99% against the 1% that currently have absolute control. We can and shall overcome the odds, but only if we truly ORGANIZE. Otherwise, we are all just as a “Single Fly, Farting in the Wind”. Some thoughts on possible miracles/solutions can be found on the following GOFUNDME page. If you have questions, suggestions, comments, etcetera, again, please feel free to contact me. You can contact me by farcecrap PM, send me an email or fill out the contact form below. Thank you.
https://www.gofundme.com/f/like-a-single-fly-farting-in-the-wind
Some immediate needs. On a volunteer basis for now, we need a WEBMASTER who can work on the ITAD-NAO website, we need a person skilled in “Crowd-Funding” and “Director of Charitable Giving”, we need an attorney to help in the legal matters for ITAD_NAO, including setting us up as a tax-exempt “Church”, we need a Certified CPA to insure the financial integrity of the ITAD-NAO organization, we need a “Chief of Security”, we need a film-maker, first for YouTube, eventually for larger platforms, plus a few other positions. We believe that somewhere down the road, a Billionaire will step up to the plate and write a check for $50 Million or so, which will turn those volunteer positions into paid positions.
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